tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-57156705041551648772024-03-14T07:29:59.246-07:00Brimstone,Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comBlogger229125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-70131026290236595242013-09-13T12:09:00.001-07:002013-09-13T13:20:02.867-07:00On the Brimstone.<br />
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
the brimstone ballet.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
the timid proud one.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Opposites magnetised to build tension.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Camden town council flats</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
next to Mornington crescent mansions.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Another London contradiction.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Two drinks in. Ten minutes from temptation.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Find a religion. Some sort of tradition.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Learn to stop the repetition. </div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Nothing if not London.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Did she fall out of love with me or was it the city I lived in.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Every time we get together a part of me goes missing.<br />
<br />
It used to be my world.<br />
<br />
Now it's a monument to a world she's not in.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Tomorrow and a year ago.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
From so far to go to the end of the road.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
All on the same road.<br />
<br />
Better off without that load.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Some cards I can't show.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Some looks I can't put into words.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Some rules aren't within laws. </div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
That's why he's not my mate anymore<br />
<br />
dance another day in the brimstone ballet<br />
<br />
The timid proud one.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Camden town council flats</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Mornington crescent mansions</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
More London contradictions</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Personalised number plates on Honda Civics.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Suped up mopeds forever revving up.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
A city divided into islands.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Stripped shirt bankers on the backs Rickshaw drivers.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Soho nights with a Sober mind.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Playing Watch the throne on the back of a bus from a mobile phone.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
I was Stuck in a Cricklewood crew.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
The world seemed so small. Even from a kite hill view.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
I knew I could do anything if I could just know what to do</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
At fourteen I heard, you can have the whole world, or be satisfied with the boulevard.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
at school we'd shout "mine" when we'd see nice cars<br />
<br />
but all of us were quiet when the big Bentley drove past.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
I've spent years trying to break that silence</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Wanting an even better life than what had been provided.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
I was always telling myself, it was going to get better</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
you know who you is? You the greatest -something- ever.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
I mean, always knew school didn't matter.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Grown with a resentment towards those who belittle others.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
You know, Not the sharpest tool in the box.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Because I'm not a tool. </div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
I'm boxed in. I'm not in the box.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Not the brightest spark.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
I don't need to be bright for you to get sparked.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Cussed. Cursed.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
They can call you what they want.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Just know you never stopped.</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Crawl when you can't walk</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Scream when you can't talk</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Dream when you can't sleep</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
Simple rhymes for complex times</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
write lines to make the complex simplified</div>
<div style="font: 13.0px 'Lucida Grande'; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 13.0px 0.0px;">
This simple mind could be a gift of mine.</div>
Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-38134544191874450222013-04-19T04:09:00.001-07:002013-04-19T04:09:27.714-07:00A history of silence.Around eight<br />
Every day that summer I cried<br />
hoping by the time dad came<br />
the tears would've dried.<br />
But there's always be stains.<br />
Faint lines for him to see<br />
how his little boy had broken that day.<br />
<br />
Sensitive, and in love with violence<br />
consumer of as many batman comics<br />
and X-men cartoons<br />
He-man and Skeletor.<br />
Lion-O and Mum-Ra<br />
Spider-man and Venom<br />
Batman and Joker<br />
Power Rangers and Rita<br />
Streetsharks, beetleborgs<br />
biker mice from mars<br />
and the teenage mutant<br />
hero turtles<br />
each one sung the same song<br />
and through the throwing of a punch<br />
I saw the difference between right and wrong.<br />
<br />
<br />Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-45985872690663730952013-03-28T07:00:00.000-07:002013-03-28T07:00:04.785-07:00Galazy.I drink because it's fun<br />
and I drink till I'm drunk<br />
till my thoughts turn to thunks<br />
and my head is empty<br />
with exception of my wants.<br />
I don't want much<br />
but I want her<br />
and I want her so much<br />
it kind of hurts<br />
when I think about it<br />
my mind gets heavy with thoughts<br />
so I drink to lighten my load<br />
and then i drink some more.<br />
<br />
She loves the character Alabama<br />
Written by that director Quentin Tarantana.<br />
<br />
If music dictates fashion<br />
I'd imagine she'd have given<br />
every genre a listen<br />
black and white pictures<br />
from her last trip to Berlin<br />
make her the Galaxy<br />
chocolate bar of women.<br />
Something I thought I couldn't afford<br />
even when I had twice the worth<br />
if not more.<br />
Not advertised for the likes of me<br />
wanting to leave gigs early<br />
to play sonic 2 on his Nintendo Wii.<br />
tears on a page- streets of rage without skates<br />
your face so close to my face.<br />
<br />
Some things I thought I could never see<br />
once a week I'd treat myself to KFC<br />
like a siren it's smell would sing to me<br />
as soon as I stepped out of Farringdon station<br />
sitting in the restaurant, wrapping chicken skin<br />
round the chip would be the closest feeling<br />
I had to calm before you came along<br />
I try to talk but can barely hear you over the song<br />
I need a simple thing to focus on.<br />
Your legs- in those leggings<br />
Your hair- in that hairband<br />
Your words- in that mouth<br />
I try not to think out loud<br />
my thoughts aren't that loud now<br />
and I don't feel a need to space out<br />
I could even settle down<br />
ease from this world<br />
in the middle of the night<br />
without making a sound<br />
in an out of london house<br />
two children and a second hand<br />
BMW in the garage<br />
"That's nice- what's the mileage?"<br />
I don't know what that question means<br />
and I dread it being asked.<br />
<br />
Fuck. sorry.<br />
<br />
Quiet and loud<br />
timid and proud<br />
i've tried to be everything I've been able to see<br />
in the hope it would round me out.<br />
find a key to escape the empty house<br />
I share with my conscience who treats me like a spouse<br />
from the window we'd watch the word tear itself apart<br />
now all I do is come home late and all she wants to do is fight<br />
it's so tense you could cut the tension with a knife<br />
sorry for saying the word knife<br />
I know a word like knife isn't right<br />
but something about living in this city<br />
makes listening to Joni mitchell not fit right.<br />
Violence isn't an art. It's a language.<br />
<br />
All the stars are held in light bulbs<br />
i can see stories in constellations<br />
<br />
I don't believe in god as much as I do religion.<br />
I haven't seen mystical signs as much as guidelines<br />
followed by nice guys living life right.<br />
It'd be a life I'd like but I suffer from a lack of faith<br />
to stick with anything that wont meet me halfway-<br />
- right at the borderline.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-14729911641165640172013-02-09T10:36:00.001-08:002013-02-09T10:36:19.838-08:00ensemble so far.<br />
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
from the humble beginnings of a Pelicans wings</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
through jungles human beings have never seen</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
moving past trees and brushing on leaves</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
it picks up speed across rivers into seas </div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
creates hurricanes that destroy distant cities</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
crashing and breaking into a million pieces</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
legs turn into tornadoes</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
arms to storms</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
the voice seeks peace</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
on these deserted city streets</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
it's dying scream of the winds base</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
pushes the hair away from her face.</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
She's still got her knees up and arms pumped</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
He drags himself across the land google maps forgot</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
Just keep running.</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
This is a street for cars with tinted windows,</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
and people who knew where they where five minutes ago</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
where with the exception of your breath and heartbeat</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
all sights and sounds come from connecting streets</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: right;">
(Honks of</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: right;">
the roar of</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
these are the streets in-between streets</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
the place that takes everyone to a deja vu</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
red lights of stops signs taunt as a finish line</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
both going towards some type of bright light</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
Just keep moving.</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
his scuffed fists grab weathered bricks</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
Just keep breathing.</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
forehead rests against the wall</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
phlegm dangles from his chin</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
chest bounces as if on hydraulics</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
he sees polka dots emerge on the pavement</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
and no matter the condition, every single person </div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
in a six mile radius has the same thought as him</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
"is it, raining?"</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
it hard knocks the skin's soft spotslike a comic book landlord wanting rent</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
find a footing in dented cement and a broken leg</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
he takes a step forward but the knee pops</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
these are the rain drops we take as a sign from god</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
where you regret the clothes you bought from sweat shops</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-align: center;">
the spit slips into a puddle of green</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<br /></div>
Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-65299220459074993162013-02-06T08:50:00.001-08:002013-02-06T09:25:26.985-08:00Reunited. Double lp, world excited.<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 15px;">Two years. Hand on the rail</span><br />
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
each step equates to a month I lose</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
and by the time I'm at the door</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
I'm back to when I spelt "her" as "you".</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
the bell rings.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
There's a blur through the window</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
walking towards the door,</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
the silence between it being opened</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
is longer than the two years spent apart.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
The latch turns along with my stomach.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
my eyes take in every possible exit,</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
the door opens and all I am is </div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 18.0px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
unsure.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
And I look at her. </div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 18.0px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
And I still don't know. She looks a little different.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
more comfortable and less delicate.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
she's got a long black skirt and a blue velvet top.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
We hug and I move into one train of thought</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
Her hugs used to come often</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
more often with less clothes on,</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
and distance.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
Our arms slowly leave each others side</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
satisfied, like an after-festival bath.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
we borderline sigh, lock eyes</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
and laugh.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
Two years.<br />
<br />
Where are you taking me<br />
Where are you leading me to<br />
What do I want. I don't think<br />
it's something new.<br />
<br />
<div style="font-size: medium; font: normal normal normal 15px/normal Times; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
She's the only one in and all the lights are on.</div>
</div>
<div style="font-size: medium; font: normal normal normal 15px/normal Times; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
(Wasteful) I felt embarrassed for remembering</div>
</div>
<div style="font-size: medium; font: normal normal normal 15px/normal Times; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
last month I had a one night stand with a woman</div>
</div>
<div style="font-size: medium; font: normal normal normal 15px/normal Times; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
in a flat that had the exact same layout as this.</div>
</div>
<div style="font-size: medium; font: normal normal normal 15px/normal Times; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
I don't tell her because it's not relevant</div>
</div>
<div style="font-size: medium; font: normal normal normal 15px/normal Times; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
and honestly I don't want her to hear it.</div>
</div>
<div style="font-size: medium; font: normal normal normal 15px/normal Times; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; min-height: 18px;">
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
<br /></div>
</div>
<div style="font-size: medium; font: normal normal normal 15px/normal Times; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
I still see myself with her as a nineteen year old</div>
</div>
<div style="font-size: medium; font: normal normal normal 15px/normal Times; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
who felt guilty when I felt her boobs in a hug.</div>
</div>
<br /></div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
She says she's bought too much.<br />
but it's only when the fourth can's drunk</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
We feel warmed up enough</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
to talk of what was,</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
who's done what and mainly,</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
Laugh. At each other,</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
at those around us and mainly,</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
our past.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
I ask about her acting,</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
it's stagnant.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
She asks about stand-up,</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
I red stripe click, swig.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
Her floor is wooden and shiny and</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
I'm tired.<br />
Everything's naps in the afternoon, early mornings and late nights with walks home evaluating how gigs went with lamp posts. The parts I hate the most are the other comedians jokes. Nearly every single one is a type of a person doing an impression of someone better than them. Five out of six a shit Bill Hicks. On a bill of twenty one from seven till eleven- I rarely find someone I can connect with. Watching- It seems- It's- Misogyny. Racism is a no go but every night I'm hearing at least ten rape jokes. Per set. Until you spend a night watching twenty comedians you'll never know how long five minutes is. It sounds bad but what I think offends me more than the subject matter is how shoddily these jokes are put together. They bypass craft for the an easy laugh. Say they were bullied in school I want to say I bet through your eyes. the whole world has bullied you. Do you know what I mean I'm sorry I know you know what I mean. You get me.<br />
<br />
I wait all night to hear "Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the stage... See-An... Mahooney!" I pick up the mic stand wrong and get tangled in the chord having every eye watch my first line fluffed- and I'm, forced into this moment, but I can't force a moment or deliver blows. They have to laugh not from queues but because they want to and to not know why. It's a challenge but it's really fun. You know when I started I used to have my hands covered in lines, bullet points, but then that would me step out of where I am. I need to be, present. With them. which means talking till I find what room I've left my jokes in. it rarely does but when when it goes right they see all the little animals and faces I've been seeing for years. I get happy that I'm not crazy, or that I am and have found a way for it to work for me. It's fun. It's really alright.<br />
<br />
She looks for my eyes<br />
and finds me using the smile<br />
that only she ever got to see.<br />
I knew I was in love when I saw her.<br />
And this time, I knew I was in love again.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 18.0px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
She says something about missing me</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
and in that moment</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
all this heartbreak feels so teenage.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
Three minutes of silence</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
as shutterbug by big obi plays.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
a poetic moment ruined</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
by an ipod left on shuffle.</div>
Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-4744226765217421822013-01-27T13:07:00.004-08:002013-01-27T15:29:46.362-08:00Sonic unleashed.Every full moon<br />
my penis becomes a werewolf<br />
that howls for you<br />
He runs down the road<br />
like an angry segway<br />
eyeing out other dickheads to fight<br />
<br />
what you lookin' at?<br />
what you lookin' at?<br />
what you lookin' at?<br />
Dickhead.<br />
<br />
He howls for you<br />
and eats donner kebabs<br />
and prank calls mini cabs<br />
barks at short skirts<br />
gets kicked out of strip clubs<br />
and when listening to rap music<br />
says the N-word.<br />
For realz.<br />
<br />
He roams all of central london<br />
and in the streets throws tantrums,<br />
swims in trafalgar square fountains,<br />
dunks people heads in after<br />
luring people into thinking he's a dolphin<br />
<br />
at comedy clubs he heckles comedians,<br />
who say "we've got a right dick in the audience"<br />
and he says "yeah. I am" and he comedian says<br />
"Oh. Wow. Yeah. You really are"<br />
and he then forgets all of his jokes.<br />
<br />
he pushes over statue men in covent garden,<br />
and when asked why he says it's because they ignored him<br />
and bumps and grinds at student club nights<br />
and after he's used up all of his freedom<br />
he still hasn't got anyones attention.<br />
<br />
Now it's oxford street, four in the morning.<br />
<br />
what are you looking at?<br />
you lookin at me mate<br />
walk on, walk on.<br />
dickhead.<br />
<br />
Grrrrrrrrrrr.<br />
<br />
he can't sleep yet<br />
he howls<br />
and barks<br />
and huffs<br />
and puffs<br />
and screams<br />
and he feels his skin<br />
catching fire<br />
but no doors open<br />
no houses come down.<br />
i find him the next morning<br />
silent and strong.Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-56312033337024206372012-11-01T15:22:00.003-07:002012-11-26T18:35:26.265-08:00Love don't live here anymore.<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Foot prints on a cloud</span><br />
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">it's the small things i see</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">that remind me</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">you're not around.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">Hearing texts</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I hold my breath</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I bite my tongue</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">to stop myself</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">How many stand ups</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">have really stood up?</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I can't gig anymore</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">it puts my back up.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">looking at picture of deadpool</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">and when it rings I can't pick up.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">you need help?</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I'll have your back</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">if you take my hand</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">but if not I don't mind</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I mean I do mind</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I just know it doesn't sound nice,</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">to put insurance on a relationship</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">but the last time I followed my heart</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I got lost with too much left</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">and not enough right.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 12px;"></span></span><br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I don't know what it'll take for you to</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">mellow my mind.</span></span></div>
<br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">now theres not enough time</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">for me to love another and myself</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">and if theres one thing I've learnt</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">from the lovers that have left me burnt</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">is that you should always come first</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">ring ring, me.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I don't want to talk.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">but could you talk to me?</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">It's not me. It's not you.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I mean it's not me.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">It's you.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">The first love.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">there from the start</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">and I don't expect you to call</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">but like clockwork you do.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">Don't ask me if I'm well</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">when we both know</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">you're the reason I'm not.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I've been through a few changes</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">that've involved blowing second chances.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">a part of me knows we're meant to be</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">but I don't know in what capacity</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">no one should take up every memory</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">so quickly.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I don't miss her.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">(I <i>don't</i> miss her)</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">Only, crave.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I feel like we get calm</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">in the eyes of our storms</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I only escape the palpitations</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">when I'm with the person</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I'm trying to escape from.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">We're a rose royce song.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">about love going wrong.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">but even in poems</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">we're not as poetic.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I keep on wanting to finish</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">but we're never near done</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">and I've left everything that</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">reminds me of home</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">so I can't blame where I'm from.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">You can't understand unless</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">you're trying to be a grown up</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">in the place you grew up in</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">and know this new you is different</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">to the man that was promised.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">And each pavement slab you see</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">is a reminder on how you haven't.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I wanted to be a super hero</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">all I've got now is a bullshit ego</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">and texts in my drafts I can't let go</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">and drafts on my twitter</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">and buttons that hover over numbers</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">and phone calls I can't answer.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">and parties I don't go to</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">because the only fuck ups I can handle</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">are the ones that are on my terms.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-13833736001004370722012-10-30T04:53:00.000-07:002012-10-30T04:53:18.945-07:00DDAll the pictures are of him being happy with his girlfriend and working in the merchandise shop of his football club<br />
and i think to myself<br />
WHAT A WONDERFUL WORRRRRRRRRRRRRRLDThunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-73912376064887642942012-10-29T14:33:00.002-07:002012-10-29T14:33:14.952-07:00The email I never sent.<br />
<div style="font: 15.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
dammit FIDHCK I didn't want that in writing. Or over email. Oh well.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
I didn't even ask. I did make a decision though. To ask you out. I made it yesterday. On the way home after MXPS IRY84 IBG0 IA, when you went with U04- I wondered if you had slept with him and it hurt because you have no obligation to me and are free to do what you want, sleep with who you want. I then realised i am a little attached and I care for you more than i thought i did.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
so that's why I made that decision yesterday. I'm annoyed because I wanted to present a case that wouldn't feel like i was addressing a problem. I feel like we really get on. Texting, and emails and long talks. the only thing that would changes is that there'd be more of it. And exclusivity. That's how you'd look at it mathematically. I've felt that you've dealt with a lot of people that have been all talk so I've been trying to show you I care through actions but sometimes talking is an action. Sometimes saying something can be the biggest, hardest thing in the world to do, if you mean it. I don't know whether to stop writing now or not. I don't want to pour what i feel, how i feel, into an email. I really don't but the last two times i saw you i pussied out of saying what i feel. So maybe I'm not ready either. I just want to be there. and to hold your hand and stuff. but I can't so just know I'll be here. heeyyyy.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
Also, please don't palm any of this off on me just moving on and wanting to be with someone and you're the first. It's not that. It's you. I really like you. I feel like i can talk to you about anything and every time you're in an audience i give it my all and it comes natural. You give the best Seanface. It makes me melt.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 18.0px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
That's why i wanted to see you today. I don't want to look at you and feel like I can't talk to you. We never talked about us until at our most drunk. there is no us though. but that's good.</div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 18.0px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font: 15.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
It'll be easier for us to be friends if we were as friendly to each other as we are to IE6TBFO and UEBH (I really don't think i send IE6TBFO or UEBH around three emails a day)- don't you think that would be easier? I think it would.</div>
Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-64383728296097693792012-10-29T13:56:00.002-07:002012-10-29T14:02:41.901-07:0025.11.08 15:39<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<br />
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">oh wow dude.</span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 13.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">your dad...he sounds like a very cool cat. i think he would have got on well with my uncle. two very down dudes with lots of talent but naughty habits. so that is where the coolness comes from dude! its like inheriting a certain colour hair or something. the cool vibes you know, the smart way with words. you must be really proud to have a pops like that. how groovy. </span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">i bet he digs the stories you write. right? ah how cool.</span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 13.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">thanks for sharing it with me thunderbolt. (tips hat and grins) </span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 13.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">x</span></div>
Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-11638115168949537752012-10-28T03:14:00.000-07:002012-10-28T03:14:05.786-07:00Sometimes I think sitting on trains.<br />
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">and then when i came back everything was just worse, well i sort of forgot to eat you know? and then every day a little more bone would come and then it wasnt me anymore it was the skin all taut and stretched over lots and lots of bone. and i sort of felt like i was fading away somewhere else and i'd better get rid of the hair too in case that was too heavy now...argh. i guess it was bad. but i didnt know how bad. so when i got here, you know, and the parents saw me. well they got all upset and now things are better and the bones are going away, slowly. i'm still very thin. but at least im eating now. but the hair is gone and i miss it. because its bare bare bareness nothing to put in front and say "look at me i've got lovely long blonde hair!" now its just me. but you say i look like desire and that is better than anything because he/she rocks hard hard hard and that is awesome. so i am happy. thanks man. *hug*</span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 13.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">lumberjack jackets. we should probably get some so we can match. it might be a good look.</span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 13.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">sometimes i think sitting on trains x</span></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-6137744691085248392012-10-27T16:48:00.001-07:002012-10-29T14:02:52.696-07:0009.11.08 00:46<br />
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">there are tears streaming down my face.</span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 13.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">thank you, you have no idea how many times thank you. i needed that more than oh god i dunno i needed that. i want to say so many things, i mean gosh man...</span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 13.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">if you want something to work, you've got to put your love into it right? </span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 13.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">i'm trying. </span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">i've been reading your notes on facebook. you're writing, what you write-what you just wrote to me. argh i cant see my eyes are too full of tears. sean i wish i could hug you right now, i cant say anything more, i've got so much more to say, will say. i think as soon as you lost your comics i knew we were two people cut from the same dog eared cloth. and i'm sorry i was too much of a lame person to acknowledge it. </span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 13.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">it's dark now and the street lamps are on in washington. i can see the monuments from outside this window. i feel so far from where i want to be, but hearing from you-all the letters/words/ you just gave to me, i feel almost like myself again. sean, dude, i wish i could express how much happier you have just made me feel. argh i feel like my head is full of cotton. </span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 13.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">see i know you know, because you know right? just to know you know,,, ah man that's enough to make me smile. </span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 13.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">ok let's make a deal, if i had a knife or some sort of cool thing-you know we'd make it a blood brother deal....</span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 13.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">i promise. i promise-i will be here for you. whenever, whatever, because i get it, and you get it. </span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 13.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 11.0px Times; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">if that aint love then tell me what is. </span></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-40202513795901205352012-10-27T12:24:00.002-07:002012-10-27T12:24:37.091-07:00Karmel.<br />
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
The cars move too fast around me</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
as the bus came I said goodbye to Dean</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
ending our debate on whether a new year really makes a difference</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
I think it's a good enough excuse to make one</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
this rain falls hard, but I still don't put my hood on.</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
I reflect on the best year of my life</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
and though i try to block it out</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
I know there's one regret I can't leave behind.</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
hey.</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
I never should've let go of my winter coat</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
the rain almost pierces through my skin</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
an unlucky optimist sees it as a baptism</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
the excuse to let go of the same old</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
to choose to travel down a new route</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
before my way gets labelled as infamy</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
none of these places get me to where I want to be</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
because none of those places put you next to me</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
to feel the way I used to</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
this new life is too close to what I've been used to</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
I hate that this current lifestyle is now the usual</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
Get up don't make love don't be touched</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
go out late don't know how to cry for help</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
get drunk, act like the texts sent themselves</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
I've felt like that with you, I could've done better</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
my apologies come in texts asking for meet ups</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
that between us being so busy never seem to come.</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
This piece has taken a few years to write.</div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
I think we'll be friends one day.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-45995013079280396192012-10-24T14:49:00.003-07:002012-10-24T14:49:51.802-07:00A break up.Ann has her eyes closed dancing to "It's got to be real" by Cheryl Lynn in an overtly sexualised manner with the brides father. He touches her bum . He's eighty six.<br />
Her eyes open and pan to the corner of the Marquee where all napkin origami swans have been crumpled. No one's sat there. Sophie pulls her arms to carry on dancing.<br />
<br />
She twirls to find Jeremy, not moving, with his coat on and hers in his arm.<br />
They both stand still. He looks at her. Her face is lowered at the coat. They're both silent.<br />
<br />
Grabs the coat, storms through the dance floor, straight to<br />
<br />
Sitting in the cab looking at the door.<br />
Tapping at the window.<br />
Tapping at the window.<br />
Tapping at the window.<br />
The door opens. He strolls to the car, apologises to the cab driver.<br />
<br />
They look out their windows.<br />
<br />
About half an hour in It's got to be real by Cheryl Lynn plays on the radio and she starts crying.<br />
<br />
His hands wrestle with each other.Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-29821296536908099042012-10-23T15:11:00.000-07:002012-10-23T15:11:30.138-07:00London part one.<span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: 1px; color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;">The train stops like slides with socks<br />Fifty percent of Londoners don’t know how to stop<br />the other half don’t know how to start<br />I move with all I’ve got but don’t move with enough<br />I don’t read enough books<br />I don’t breathe enough<br />I’m too hard on myself<br />and lacklustre dream chasers<br />It’s London.<br />All we have to do is<br />make it happen.<br />for two years I haven’t had a<br />good enough reason<br />to be leaving<br />constantly harassing me<br />while making it clear that<br />she doesn’t need me<br />We’ve concluded from recent reports that<br />seven out of ten londoners wear ipods<br />to ignore whatever street workers sell us<br />as soon as she walked in<br />all the noise of my head was deafened.<br /><br />at Nineteen.<br />I met an American who was in love with<br />the city i lived in,<br />and proceeded to show me<br />a side of the city<br />I never knew existed<br />my world had expanded<br />beyond cricklewood<br />and west hampstead<br />did you know<br />one in three of all east london men<br />have handlebar moustaches?<br />and half of them talk out their arses.<br />His name was Johna,</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: 1px; color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;">He talked often </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: 1px; color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;">about the house boat </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: 1px; color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;">he lived in</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: 1px; color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;">trips to india, said words like "eloquent"</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: 1px; color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;">played clash songs on the ukelele</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: 1px; color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;">had a perfectly trimmed stubble</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: 1px; color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;">and chatted up girls while calling them babe</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: 1px; color: #454545; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;">I put my head down<br />as if he was talking that shit in a year room<br />and if i looked like I’m his friend<br />a portion of chips, beans and cheese<br />would also be thrown at my head<br />but no school dinners came<br />not even beats<br />he talked wank<br />and got off free-<br />in some ways<br />you could say<br />he inspired me.</span>Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-50550305193838259832012-10-22T13:54:00.003-07:002012-10-22T13:54:58.350-07:00Second draft. The vent.Quarter to twelve and it's tea number four.<br />
Maybe I should just vent my thoughts.<br />
See if where I am is a place others have been before.<br />
Not sure if I can last as long as my mates<br />
I don't read much nor am I one for wordplay<br />
how long can I really put a broken heart on display<br />
I was nineteen when she said I'd be great one day.<br />
One day you'll really be something special.<br />
Back then I didn't know what to say,<br />
Far as I was concerned, I was already great<br />
But the American didn't need rumours to go her own way<br />
Now I'm with those who chain smoke listening to the chain.<br />
Given up most reaches for fame because it's embarrassing watching it chased<br />
No, please do not ask me to retweet every product you make<br />
nothing sadder than a former star refusing the request to fade away.<br />
With that said, ladies and gentlemen, singer songwriter for queen, Brian May!<br />
She said I'd be great one day. That's all I need. One day.<br />
A day when I can look at my face from outside of myself<br />
Clean my flat, answer my emails, figure little things out<br />
remove each thought from my head and place them back<br />
like tetris bricks and throw away the ones that don't fit.<br />
instead I'm tangled with the parts of me I can't lose<br />
each one taken a loss I've tried to remove myself from.<br />
But if I can get that one day all those regrets will be gone.<br />
Find a new beginning in a kiss like that night i was reborn.<br />
Maybe that one day came and it's time to move on.<br />
I've got to keep on talking, my head is too crowded<br />
and I can't keep my thoughts in.<br />
Englishmen don't suffer from depression<br />
before suffering from repression<br />
Too much pride to put your hand up in lesson<br />
where I come from you can't afford to be wrong<br />
Chairs sooner flung before you admit trouble with the sum<br />
When it's all you've got lets see how valuable pride is to you<br />
some jobs you just can't work<br />
as you're still waiting to be given what you feel is deserved<br />
weird position to be in wen you've got so much to prove<br />
but can't afford to lose and it's like life's closed off all routes<br />
so you stay in your room and play video games all day<br />
wondering what the fuck it is you can do- Zombie blues<br />
just slip away. Just let is slip away. One day you'll escape.<br />
All we've got is mates that hate others success<br />
and you laugh with them but in your head you know<br />
it'd be so much better if they were all dead<br />
because you're tired of having to pretend you're happy with them<br />
after all these years of doing nothing all you want to do is start again.Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-33928755250186963182012-10-21T13:30:00.005-07:002012-10-21T13:30:54.441-07:00First draft."Who'd really want to hear the backstreets of my mind?"<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Third floor of the southbank.</div>
<div>
We've asked questions about writing and what to say, </div>
<div>
I have a problem with pushing too much back. </div>
<div>
Putting too much behind when the words that inspire </div>
<div>
are the ones people stutter to say something that's been</div>
<div>
building up and swirling around their head for months</div>
<div>
and when they break through each one's a release of honesty that </div>
<div>
chills your bones. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
When everyone left we went to the pub.</div>
<div>
Had a few drinks and you talked about your ex</div>
<div>
how you've left her for the next and you're worried</div>
<div>
because it's not confirmed and you don't know what's next</div>
<div>
and you've been worried about losing peers respect.</div>
<div>
Friends respect. My respect. I took a gulp.</div>
<div>
Gulp. Said don't worry, you're doing what you think is right.</div>
<div>
You're following your heart so there's no regrets.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
And I started to feel words leap frog over what was planned</div>
<div>
I closed them down. Shut them down. Shut up. proper obvs.</div>
<div>
But words never really go, they'll come through</div>
<div>
just directed at others, the people who'll forgive you</div>
<div>
for saying reckless stuff but I haven't lashed out,</div>
<div>
I've kept it in, pushed it back to the backstreets of my mind.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
And who'll really want me to call you a cunt?</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-79500152098815505792012-10-20T10:01:00.003-07:002012-10-20T10:01:32.815-07:00We've been here before<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
when a one night stands last three months</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
it becomes harder to come apart</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
and harder to accept every time you leave</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
is a potential break up.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
after a girl and a gig I'll find a bus home to fall</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
asleep,</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
It's not a complaint, this is the live I've chosen</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
to live.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
not like my hand wasn't forced but I'll take what</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
I can get.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
A sunny street, oranje juice, polish donut</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
and real as it gets from the blueprint three.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
I didn't get myself out of a place I hated,</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
instead did renovations.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
The man who once held my body in his hands</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
trusts his life into mine.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
One day I'll provide</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
but now I can't shoot low and aim aim high</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
Now everything is undone while intertwined</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
unravels and everything i love leaves me behind</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
well you know what that's fine. Fucking great.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
Keep as straight as you think straight is.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
She only wants what was,</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
and she must have wanted me so much</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
because she pushed me so hard</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
It's not her fault, </div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
she didn't know I still had my dreamcast</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
that I've got a lockjaw for loyalty.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
didn't have to turn my friends into enemies.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
I can't keep on losing them.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
coming back to this blog.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
Telling stories about Max and Jade</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
when I haven't seen either for months.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
Once girl came into the midst of it all</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
I'd see her every week in east london</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
we'd talk about big krit and 2chainz</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
and we'd kiss all night at her place</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
she's the closest thing to calm I've ever felt.</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
I don't even know if I miss her.</div>
Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-72188755398997399892012-10-19T16:39:00.003-07:002012-10-19T17:17:01.442-07:00crushing.If I was her when I met me I'd handle that nineteen year old with care.<br />
I'd keep in contact as much as possible, I'd try to take him to new places<br />
Meet my friends, show him his talents. I wouldn't want to alienate him<br />
when drinking and pretending to fit in while he watches me be different.<br />
Different to how I was when we first met. I'd want him to remind me of who I was.<br />
I'd want him to inspire me as much I hopefully do him. And when I read beautiful words.<br />
Words about me. Seeing me in a light I don't believe I deserve to be in.<br />
I'll tell him how beautiful each one is while walking that tightrope thin line<br />
between telling him how special he is while not leading him on.<br />
I'd spend more alone time with him, trusting that, although he loves me,<br />
He respects the fact that I don't feel the same way- that I'm too self obsessed<br />
and focused on success to give anyone any spare space in my head.<br />
I wouldn't kiss him, I'd probably come close by accident<br />
but wouldn't give into my weakness. It'd be too much for him.<br />
We'd talk about music, I'd give him the names of bands that'll change his life like they did mine.<br />
He could do whatever he wanted with my name, put it on social networking sites<br />
give me a new one. I'd smile at thunderbolt. I'd tell him I loved him and<br />
regret it because I didn't mean it like that I I<br />
I wouldn't leave him alone so suddenly. I wouldn't cut him off<br />
in such a way that'd have him scarred for the rest of my life. His life.<br />
and have pictures of my new dude on facebook. I<br />
wouldn't ignore him for the sake of another man's insecurity.<br />
<br />
I'd want to love him the way he loves me. I'd really want to.<br />
But I wouldn't be able to. I'm twenty something and too far gone.<br />
Pretending to be a grown up and impressing peers that don't have half my heart<br />
and I'd make sure you know that no one has have half your talent.<br />
You're really fucking special. You need to know that I love you in a way<br />
that hurts me too because I know the love I have for you isn't the one you want<br />
and anything other than what you want is seen as a rejection but it's not.<br />
I'd like to see you and be open again. For you to see what's within<br />
I'm too broken right now for kisses for anyone I want to know forever though.<br />
I want to know you for forever though.<br />
<br />
If i was her I'd still want to know him. I'd want to keep in check.<br />
See if he's ready to be friends yet.<br />
<br />
If I was in this position, I'd hope he'd understand.<br />
<br />Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-17312380019436774952012-10-19T14:53:00.001-07:002012-12-15T08:06:37.144-08:00I miss my friend.<br />
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">Give a girl your heart</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">but don't get angry at her when she breaks it.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">It's like a comedian taking compliments for being brave</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">and then blames the audience when he gets booed offstage</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">a boxer doesn't complain when he gets hit</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">don't enter the game if you don't know how to play it</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I saw you and instantly wanted to know more</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">friends told me to stay away</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">said I didn't know the score</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">all I saw was the figure eights</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">in everything you wore,</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">All you ever talked of was</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">the men that came before</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">you'd sleep with a man</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">and it'd tear me apart</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">so I'd sleep with two women</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">and tell you. You'd laugh.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">You can't get a grip</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">here's my heart.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">Don't feel like a git</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">because you let it slip</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">we can't choose who we fall in love with</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">That's a pain I've felt before</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">a pain I can deal with</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">It's what you did afterwards</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">that makes me feel different</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">that's a pain that's new</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">has me avoiding places we went to</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">avoiding friends we call mutual</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I still don't want to make it clear</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">that I don't hate you</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">If only for the reason that</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I don't want to give anything to you.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I only hate this situation</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">and how you've defined yourself too soon.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I lost two best friends to that one night stand</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">Him a best man</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">you a not so much next girl</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">but watch dvd box sets</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">talk about my ex girl</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">go to bed and how our toes curl</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">sorry for rhyming girl with girl</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I know you wouldn't improve</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I hope you never have to write</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">a love poem for a better writer</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">than you.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I'm getting off track.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I heard tangents are good.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">It's my fault for not manning up</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">For not telling you I was in love</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">you'd sleep around and I'd just watch</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I slept with twenty women last summer</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">just to get over your touch</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">Tried racking up points to build up confidence</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">then you went and slept with my confidant</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">truth is, it was never about the score, but the goal.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">It's football with playground rules</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">no free-kicks or throw-ins</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">it gets kicked out</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">opportunity is for the one who can run</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">as long as you're single,</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">you can have whatever you want.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I knew that</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">didn't think it would hurt</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">or hurt this much</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">now at parties we're</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">right next to each other</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">with a grand canyon</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">filled with apologies and confessions</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">we don't know how to say that</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">separates us.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">And the rubies know I'm always happy to go on first</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">but this time, I can't be the one to jump</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">and I don't want her to either</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">because she misses me as a friend</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">and I miss the chance of having what could have been</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">what could have been is always beautiful</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">people still thought we were just each others jump off</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">that's cool. They can think what they want</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I just wish we never believed them</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">Woke up five ours ago</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">went for a run, checked the time</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">nine am. I miss my friend.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">And it's a shame</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">that this has to be how it ends</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">knowing that we've regressed</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; min-height: 14.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">Who goes from secrets to small talk.</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">It stresses me out</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I've kept a lid on myself for so long</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I don't even know what I'm trying to</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">stop coming from my mouth</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">Were never going to talk again</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">and if we ever do</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">it'll only be through this pen</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">nothing to say to you</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">other than it's 12 o'clock</span></div>
<div style="font: 12.0px Helvetica; margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">and I miss my friend.</span></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-29633538080468163422012-02-29T08:59:00.000-08:002012-02-29T08:59:07.371-08:00A piece from an OLLLLD notebook.Trying to keep a semblance of normality<br />
when you couldn't be further from it<br />
looking at your attempt<br />
is one of the funniest things on this planet<br />
did you embrace the change or runaway?<br />
and how many people will it take<br />
to ask if you're okay before you realise-<br />
you're really not. When your stop comes<br />
and you beg for one more stop<br />
but you've got to get off<br />
you've got to move<br />
because what was then<br />
not being what is now<br />
doesn't mean you're not<br />
the same dude<br />
it just means you've got<br />
some shit to go through.<br />
I know this because<br />
I've been through it too.<br />
One day you're going to be me<br />
and every room you'll walk in<br />
you'll be able to suss<br />
the wankers from those<br />
you can trust.Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-69288878813247248832012-01-15T05:08:00.000-08:002012-01-15T05:08:08.840-08:00My love.My love doesn't reply to my texts,<br />
belittles me among friends,<br />
and when we're alone she only<br />
ever talks of other men.<br />
My love is mine, half the time<br />
My love doesn't want to go home<br />
she wants to know where to go<br />
when the pubs close.<br />
My love's luck has ran out<br />
her weight fluctuates<br />
My love doesn't fit in<br />
but hates standing out<br />
My love has had enough of love<br />
and wants to be someone else<br />
She calls me at her worst<br />
and only in poems do I confess<br />
my urge to be hers<br />
She's up to her neck in ugliness<br />
and couldn't be more beautiful<br />
for it.<br />
She's beaten, down and out but can't<br />
forfeit.<br />
She's taken everything thrown at her<br />
and moved forward.<br />
My love has me chasing the high<br />
of the first time seeing her<br />
genuinely smile.<br />
My love was mine<br />
but it was only for a while.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-39015606425345798352012-01-09T10:55:00.000-08:002012-01-13T09:45:42.986-08:00play the game.I remember being told<br />
I was on a wayward track<br />
I asked that teacher<br />
if there was anything wrong with that<br />
Never paid attention in lessons<br />
couldn't hear answers<br />
had too too many questions<br />
schooled after class<br />
couldn't sleep at night<br />
my mind was too fast<br />
teachers never got me right<br />
taught in remedial<br />
it's shocking what a label can do<br />
Now I live with a point to prove<br />
past the point where I don't<br />
feel like I'm still in school<br />
Not a day when<br />
my eye's not on the ball<br />
And every day I ball harder<br />
I'm counted out<br />
like it's the two thousand and two<br />
F.A. Cup semi final<br />
and my name is ray Parlour.<br />
Next thing you know<br />
it's the two thousand and two<br />
F.A. Cup semi final<br />
and "it's only Ray Parlour"Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-56961832732241118422011-12-01T13:33:00.001-08:002011-12-01T13:46:30.662-08:00CRWMI strive to be original<br />
but sometimes this life<br />
feels like my fathers sequel<br />
and that's far from an insult.<br />
I'm just not one for doing<br />
what others have done<br />
I've rejected every baton<br />
others have tried to pass on.<br />
But I can't escape inspiration<br />
therefore i constantly face contradiction<br />
Jay said on to the next one<br />
but what if your loved ones wont move on.<br />
What Jokes can I make<br />
when I'm a joke myself<br />
Rhymes allow my mind to delve<br />
but the deeper I get<br />
the more shallow I become<br />
Gillian Welch said times the relevator<br />
It's only later they see they've<br />
fallen for a pretender<br />
I'm not the same when on the stage<br />
maybe my hunger for fame was a phase<br />
suffering from striving for<br />
underground king syndrome<br />
who's name echoes in deep talks<br />
and not small ones,<br />
Big Daddy Kane, Pharaoh Monch,<br />
Paul Foot, Gillian Welch, Madvillian<br />
mentions-<br />
If I can't live for forever then at least<br />
let my name be Legend, remembered.<br />
And I'm not anywhere near famous<br />
yet am already worried about a reputation<br />
Maybe I'm not cut out for bright lights and red carpets<br />
And then I whine again about not being "chosen"<br />
I'm sick of myself for so many reasons<br />
I'm sick of playing the vitctim,<br />
complaining about not being able to find someone<br />
when my phone has missed calls from good women<br />
While I'm chasing missed moments that if where offered,<br />
I'd probably not even want.<br />
I'm not talking about television<br />
when I say I have a borderline<br />
crippling addiction to loose women.<br />
Those who are the same as me<br />
who's faults aren't concealed<br />
but worn with honour and<br />
screamed when free from sobriety<br />
And I'm nowhere near as pretty as I used to be<br />
Maybe because my face has change with this view i see<br />
And that I don't look after me<br />
I eat KFC when hungry<br />
Drink whiskey when thirsty<br />
Call her when lonely<br />
She doesn't answer<br />
because she knows me<br />
I want to be with her only because<br />
then I can be the old me<br />
Before polar and comedy<br />
before strategy.<br />
When the future was a whole lot clearer<br />
Just wanting to better the person I see in the mirror<br />
Sometimes I forget what I try to live for.<br />
To be better. A better son. A better friend.<br />
A better brother. A better lover.<br />
To stop striving to be old Sean or a new one.<br />
But to be good now. I already feel better.<br />
<br />
<br />Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5715670504155164877.post-44109893896160685152011-11-21T09:59:00.001-08:002011-12-01T16:10:53.481-08:00Five kisses.Okay Alexandra, here is my poem to you<br />
<br />
I'm surprised we haven't met yet<br />
I'm surprised we're meeting at all<br />
I'm surprised by how comfortable I feel<br />
I like a lot of things about you<br />
and have been struggling with this poem<br />
because that'd mean I'd have to say them<br />
I thought I had confirmed your affections<br />
when you told me you LOVED one of my poems<br />
but was less confident when you said you also loved<br />
Louboutin red bottoms, iMessaging for iPhones<br />
the Twilight films, and selfridges christmas shop windows<br />
Love is only a word, but words are my world<br />
and your world interests me so understandably<br />
i listen to your words very carefully,<br />
I find it easier to embrace your hate for children<br />
and joke about them on our text support rush hour mornings<br />
as hate can lead to cut off arms<br />
but only love can break your heart.<br />
<br />
and right now this poem is just becoming a piece on love.<br />
<br />
and not about us.<br />
But what is "us"?<br />
we're two people who have reached out<br />
and found out we're worth checking out.<br />
it's relaxed and its' nice<br />
my poetry is awkward and melodramatic<br />
hence you waiting what seems like ages,<br />
like when i waited for the phone to ring<br />
the first time you called me<br />
it was, again, relaxed and nice<br />
surprising as how comfortable it is<br />
and how I'm weirdly writing a poem about it<br />
but why not, what i find most surprising<br />
is that this feels like a beginning<br />
and knowing what weight the word brings<br />
I love that you love things<br />
and I love iMessaging you in the mornings and<br />
I'd love to see you in louie buton red bottoms<br />
and I'd love to go to the cinema with you,<br />
preferably wouldn't love a twilight film though.<br />
i find it healthy that you took an interest in me<br />
the same time i started liking me.<br />
so there's a poem for you Alexandra Gideon.<br />
my future second penguin.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Thunderfoot.http://www.blogger.com/profile/03730599873932422441noreply@blogger.com