got bad to do

Phone calls and hang-ups and step toe and son re-runs.
rustling sheets lovely sandwiches and jackets as presents.

ripped-tights, made-teas, passive-aggressive arguments.

jokes. everywhere, museums new-books, cuddle, television

show-her-off parties shrugs roll-off the tongue insults

lots of drink being sick pale people warm-up breakfasts

eggs, bacon, mushrooms loving looks between menus
promises from eye contact that have one rush to the flat
stroked arms, resting heads denim daisy dukes removed
stretched stomachs in flips, smiles no longer reserved

old streets walked on spent in awe- but one's too fast

press-ups towards late-night runs to more aspirations

cold-shoulders no eye contact new looks no respect given

moonlit bodies slide with anger, train seats stare into space

inspiring work inspired from smiles laughing at them

all men that try to be something they're not, what we'll never be

no answers too scared to ask questions too proud for pain

far away looking back at yesterday try to find out what it meant

replay every event wanting another body that's heaven sent

golden green olive kisses mismatched lovers circumstances 

deal the blows take the pain, we eventually stand all the same

and if i had the choice yes i'd do it all again.

tv lights.

My fingers type away at a breakneck pace, the sound fills the room followed by a little laughter. a giggle. if you will.

i didn't anticipate this. you. here. but i did dream of it. what was most magical is that the moments we shared where never the ones i wrote. or what i thought what romance was. not pizza express but greggs, though there was a smile on your face the whole time. consequently that put a smile on mine. We're watching the wild bunch. your head is on a pillow that is on my lap. we haven't kissed yet. or confessed our need to connect. and your head is on a pillow. which is on my lap. You're beginning to fall asleep and I'm almost freaked out by how effortless this all is.

I walk you to your room and tuck you in, i could have made a move, maybe you would have welcomed it, but i didn't and weirdly enough I'm thankful for it because, I've never known courtship and evidently, despite my years watching disney,

I didn't know romance.

Another walk home now. I've lived on these streets for so long, yet, never felt admitted to the club of street-dwellers. trapped in bypass, constantly walking through and past, but truly my journey is living, but my journey is spent living the same thing. Tonight these streets see me walk slow, look up and take in the view with a new perspective, My mood is reflective, almost glad for my lonesome nights, in such a crowded space not enough hold out- just cash in but it's not worth it, if another could appreciate what her hand in mine meant, they'd understand why i walk with this slow-motion-skip in my step.

The body moves too fast for the mind to comprehend the situation, under covers our energy combined pumps an adrenaline so strong the bitten necks and pulled hair is painless and- enthusiastic legs wrapped round squeeze out hidden tears that fall on the skin you've longed for-for years. I close my eyes and when they open i lose my best friend forever, and i make a silent promise to make sure i don't fuck this up. Because i don't know much. but this is a lifestyle i could get used to, and it turns out i like to be touched.

good shit from the vault 08

I can’t perform this poem

Unless I’m on a stage

And I refuse to appear in the paper

Unless I’ve made the front page

I wont make a splash

Until I’ve made the grade

Don’t watch me learn

Just wait till my persona is made

And when that time comes

Don’t be surprised if you see a different person

Don’t be scared

Don’t be afraid

Because money changes people

And I’ll be different when I get paid

Oh lord

let this money change me

Let the red fifty pound notes

Take hold over, 
cover

Until I crinkle and fold

So when straightened out

I’ll be both the brave and the bold

Strong as knights from books of old

My presence will be felt around the world

And whenever I’m absent, you’ll be left cold

lets begin

take my eyes, nose, ears, teeth and chin

Take them all and throw them in the bin

And when you see a man with no face

Staring back at you

Don’t be scared

Don’t be afraid

Because if I want to make a living

This is what I have to do

And we will all be wealthy

And I’ll be saved. I’ll be saved.

Brave. Bold. Books. Old

The fifty pound
The Rectangular
Red notes
will
take hold
Until
like them
I crinkle 
and 
fold.

Once straightened out 
I'll be both the brave 
and the bold
Strong as the knights 

from books of old.
Work hard so our 
presence is felt 
around the world
showered with fans 
so we never feel cold

But when the armour
rusts
and the  
pages
turn to  
dust
will it  
matter
If people  
ever
talked about us?

The barrier bends.

The barrier bends

for all moments of January

(the heart lends)

Before we're broken friends-

nothing's been sane since

though outs and ins

all deserve patience

carry on ignoring and

nothing will be the same since

your barrier bended

for a heartbroken prince.

Monsters.

Everywhere I go monsters follow

Always I try keeping them from tomorrow

As all they give is grief and sorrow

but these monsters are all I know

So how could you expect me to let them go?

Though (and between just us two)

In my mind a, white, knight, of, light does grow

with all my demons he'll stand toe-to-toe

and through each blackened heart

shall be a golden arrow shot from

a modestly wooden bow, oh

how i wish this knight will show

because whether it be monster or hero

someone has to carry me into tomorrow

for alone, no, i am just too scared to go.

White knight of light

Your warmth brings me forward
My heart beats
In my arms you become weak
To stretch bent neck legs arch
Garments:
Torn apart
Dressed in moonlight
Look down, our noses
touch
Eyes meet
Know where it’s gone going and we
We have only just begun
Each kiss as if it's the first and last one
Constantly inhaling taking sharing
Each breath from each others lungs
Those delicate fingers crunch
Your eyes close and the smile no one gets to see-
Apart from me-
Is revealed and (has
More beauty, than all poetry;
No words are worthy)
Beneath the eyelids see;
Each curve kissed caressed
Heart thumping inside your chest
Panting breathing heavy unable
To neither commune nor kiss
This bliss
Such beauty unmatched
An unbreakable being a beautiful thing
bend not snapped
pulled hair lip bitten back collapsed
Change and
                    Tumble
                          and Roll and
Hips swerve, dip
Like nothing before
Gentle, you’re so gentle
Sweeter than perceived
More innocent than believed
For there is no sin
in awakening an overslept grin
you I believe in flesh more than skin
win strong no longer thin
taken to places my body hasn't been
and then, fin.
Again eyes meet
Laughter received
Both so relieved
And hug
Hold
“This is nice”
“it doesn’t get any better”
“This is the best. the best ever”
"Forever."