affair.

I never listened enough to my mum
she would always say i was headed for big things
something like a, phenomenon,
i never knew where it came from
as i was always, not, well behaved and-

figured, you could make a man from clay

open his eyes to see a new day

create ears to hear all wisdom

give him a happy home to come from

but given the choice he still wont stay

never do never will, 

held hearts always hold out for a cheap thrill
started as daily visits while he was at work
turned into walks through the park,
swalling a bitter pill when they where together

she wanted a nurturer, it's not romantic

but i tried to help her, and that urge to kill

went to her other, other-

felt my lovers future fall through broken hands 

and the enemies blood in my mouth

the enemy is myself spat out i look up

see the man she never wanted to make angry

i knew he would, but i never knew it'd be..

i guess her bruises never came from affection
leaving me the man who's help only hurt

destined to become a crippled contradiction

we lived a dream that's a little too non- fiction.

no dream has ever been all it seems,

now I'm bursting at the seams, 

depending on what way his fists lean

teeth are seen and feel mine are gone

and i wonder how long this pain will carry on

if i my arms get their act together and no longer be so weak 

i can pick myself up from the street

but his feet on my back put a stop to that 

people from the pub now come out

i wonder if what i did was really so wrong,

i was the man she could depend on

then again it was their bed we slept on.

these street lights are so orange i see all in sepia

i dedicate my last thought to my mother, 

and am sorry to have disappointed her.